Body Image

I'm not big on the feminism thing. I don't mean this in terms of disagreeing with feminism or thinking it is invalid. I mean this in terms purely as its not my thing, sort of how being tidy is also not my thing. I appreciate and honor the women who have fought for it, but it is not the frame I use to analyze the world with, but recently I have been inspired by a personal trainer at 24 hr fitness asking me repeatedly if I want to work out to lose weight. I'm not sure but the obsession with skinny would probably be within the feminist realm.

I will start with the trainer. His insistence on posing this question to me over and over again in different ways, is truly heart breaking and probably the reason so many Americans are fat. I work out because I want to feel good, I want to feel my body work ( I don't like feeling like an amorphous blob) and because I'm disabled (I don't work out now and create healthy habits I will most likely be confined to a wheel chair within the next 15 years). I have told the trainer this on multiple occasions but it seems as if he cannot believe it. Which leads me to the conclusion that he has never heard anyone else (esp a woman) say it. Hating your body is a waste of time. I definitely understand why people hate their bodies, and I have spent some of my life dwelling on my big ass and my fat thighs, but plain and simple it is a waste of brain space. I think about what I eat, when I eat, and how often I'm working out all the time. But the frame in which I think about it is different. I think our consuming glutenous society is disgusting. I think a society that sits on its asses, and eats all day is disgusting. I think these are disgusting attributes not simply because I think they are lazy but because a society composed of individuals that do these things is not composed of a society that is actively engaged in loving and caring for one another, nor creating art, or even interacting with one another. Nothing good can come from it. The consumption creates a society used to getting what they want right that second, and a society that wants wants wants. This just doesn't work for the world in general, plants don't grow right away, neither do children , nor animals. It is unnatural and should be avoided in my opinion.

But I digress. The point is that we have created a society in which half of it spends a whole lot of time self loathing. This is not only sad because its shitty to hate yourself, but because they could be thinking about other things like the cure to cancer. Plain and simple they would be better to be around if they loved themselves and the way they look. They would be nicer, more confident, and did I mention they might be curing cancer (or any of the other million problems that plague this world). In any event, seems like an urgent problem to me although the solution seems difficult, since it is not something concrete like systematic change, this one requires we change the way we treat and think about one another, an active shift in culture....

Grassroots Fundraising

What does it mean to raise money? Why raise money from individuals, especially poor individuals if there are foundations and rich people out there? Why not take from the rich and give to the poor? Isn't it anti-capitalist to take money from the rich and use it to fund our struggles?

These sentiments are just plain disturbing to me.

Grassroots fundraising to me is about ownership and empowerment. We live in a society that is controlled by the rich because they are rich. There is nothing radical, revolutionary, or even honorable about begging at their feet and competing with one another for their attention. That is only to get the money in the first place, once we get it, they have the right to set what "success" is in our community, and even ask us to do work the way they think it should be done.

Alternatively we could fund our own organizations. What's the difference? Wide based ownership and involvement in our work- because we do not have a lot of money, all of us would have to contribute albeit smaller contributions. With wide based ownership comes collective responsibility and true accountability to our community rather than a few rich folks. No one has unequal power, if someone decides the organization, work, and members no longer reflect their values they do not have the power to completely cripple nor shut down entire programs. There is also a recognition that we can not all do social justice nonprofit organizational work, but we are all involved in the struggle and can contribute to that struggle through different means. This is at its heart radical and revolutionary, it is truly taking control and power over our lives and outcomes. It is a clear statement that we can control our destinies and we will. When we are asking for money, we are not asking for money. We are asking for collective responsibility we are asking you, will you be part of the solution and change rather than the problem?