The "Human Experience"

We are so vastly different, so much so in fact I do not have the language to express it. I think two experiences have specifically shaped this reality for me, going to college and getting MS.

I went to Stanford University, for a number of reasons, at the top of the list though was the fact that Stanford has one of the largest Native populations for its caliber of education. I am Yaqui, Apache, Mexican, and White (if you don't know already), and I grew up in a predominately white town. For reasons that we will not go into today, I have always been passionate about racial inequality. Since the time I was probably 8 or 9 I have been talking about inequality and racism. So when I went to college I wanted to A) get as far away from Colorado as possible, and B) be around other people of color, specifically Natives. I went to college because I felt that it was vital that the world change, and it was my duty as a participant privileged enough to think about college to go and try and make some positive changes.

So I went to school, and I was astonished at what I found. As a young naive 18 year old, I thought being a person of color = being radical. But of course I found that this was not true; I felt betrayed, sad, and frustrated. I could not understand why everyone hadn't come to the same conclusions I had at a younger age, "the world is racist and fucked up". Eventually as I adjusted to school, I found more patience and love than I could have ever imagined. For those who know me, this may be a laughable idea, since most would not consider me loving and patient :P but I found more than I had had before, that's for sure! In reality though, the Native community at Stanford taught me a true diversity, that I will forever appreciate. From eccentric individual personalities to huge variations on political, religious, and cultural beliefs.

Now I must not have learned enough the first time, because the Creator sent me another lesson on diversity. For whatever dumb reason, I thought I would start talking to people with MS and there would be certain "given" rules. Everyone would have similar advice, there would be an accepted way to deal with the disease, I could incorporate the advice and move on. Well clearly this is in no way true. I have spoken on the phone with 2 people who have MS, and officially after my first injection last night (Started my meds- they're a trip!) I met in person a woman (my nurse) who has had MS for 35 years. Let me just say that their advice is all so very different that it almost leaves me in the same place I was before asking for it.

In reality these differences in advice, probably have to do with entirely different lives, coping mechanisms, cultures, and knowledge. But what struck me as originally responsible was the disease itself. MS is a disease that essentially is entirely unknown. What I mean by that is that it is random; random in time, random in symptoms, random in progression, random in levels of disability. It would seem near impossible to build solidarity on anything other than the random aspect. Which I think lends itself to driving everyone a little nuts. There seems to be a lot of fanaticism with MS, everybody swears by something. It's interesting, I don't know if I can articulate it more. I'm excited to learn from this community whatever it is I am to learn. A little upset the Creator choose to put me in a predominately white community, but maybe its to help be get over all my issues :P