Positivity

I'm currently rather depressed, seems as if my life has gone to shit in the last week or so. But it will be okay, it always is. And in order to speed along that process I'm going to focus this particular entry on all the things I am blessed because of.

My grandmother the strongest woman I have ever known. The woman who taught me to garden, to cook, who taught me to bead, who taught me that strength and resilience are important features to have as a person but especially as a woman. She taught me that action outside of our own personal lives is not only necessary but required. She taught me that we do not live our lives as individuals but as part of something bigger. It is our responsibility to our fellow beings, and to our future children to try and make this place better than the way we found it. She also taught me that I have to protect myself, that I can rely on no one else to do that.

My mother is now the strongest woman I know. She has taught me independence, resilience, responsibility, and strength. My mother has always wanted to make sure that if she were to die, to leave, to be inaccessible, that I would be okay, that I would know how to survive, love, and live without her. She helped to mold me as a person that does not NEED any one person, but NEEDS a community. She taught me emotional and physical strength, encouraging confidence.

My father is the perfect mirror for my mother. It is my father who taught me to be sensitive, defend what is right with emotion, to work hard, to have pride in my work. He taught me that I should live with emotion, even if its more tumultous. He taught me to live passionately. He also taught me how to let go, and have fun in a way that now permeates me essence- well as long as i'm not thinking about race :) lol

My friends, well they are amazing. Each has taught me so much. And they have cared, they have loved, and they have allowed me to care and love. They have taught me in the most intimate way to manage relationships through, happyness, hatred, and fear. They have taught me to love and enjoy things I would have never tried or imagined. They have taught me to love humans, not identities/labels.

I have a social network that sustains me, that is better than me, that I am eternally grateful for. I also know that my placement on this earth is not just for myself, that I have responsibilities, and changes to help create and make.

So when I get wrapped up in the small stuff, and I lose track of why I am on this world, and who I am with, I need just remind myself of all these things.